THIS BETTER WORK

It is with sad regret that I inform you all that I will no longer be able to wear mascara. Not only does it now clump my 10 remaining eyelashes together to look like two monster eyelashes, I am quite conscious of not pulling out these last few little fellas. Good news is the eyebrows are still holding strong. I knew these giant eyebrows which, along with many other areas of body hair, which have been the bane of my existence for so many years would put up a good fight. If they've withstood my efforts to get rid of them over the last 15 years, I bet they can take a little more of whatever chemo can throw at them before they give up the good fight.

I am suffering a little bit more on this round, I'm just not getting back to normal. It's been a week and usually by this time I'm fine, gearing up for the next round. Not this time though. Everything aches, I still have the remnants  of the horribleness that was 'mouth sores of round 3 disaster' and I'm unbearably tired all the time. Had to have a sit down this morning after carrying a load of laundry downstairs and putting it in the machine. Yet again, I imagine this is what it feels like to be really really old. I'm hoping this is just part of the 'it's different every time' thing and not a sign that my days of feeling normal between hits are going to become fewer and fewer.

In other upsetting news, I got an email (??) from my liaison nurse at the hospital (same nurse who emailed me to inform me I was HIV negative before I started chemo!!) and she said that the oncologist who has been looking after me (and also got pony kicked by me during my bone marrow biopsy) was faxing a prescription to my local pharmacy and I was to go pick it up and start taking it immediately and they'd phone me later today to tell me why.... emmm no. I called and it turns out my stupid stupid STUPID white blood cell count was borderline last week getting my chemo and for the rest of my chemo I'd have to give myself (Nick will have to give me) daily injections to boost them. I also found out that due to my crappy veins which are being made even crappier by chemo, I will be having a picc line inserted into my arm next week. As if the baldness, grey skin and dark circles didn't scream out 'I'M SICK' quite enough, I now have to have a fully visible 6 inch tube with a tap on it hanging out of my arm for the next 4-5 months. Lovely.

All I keep thinking is THIS BETTER WORK.